Today, I feel it’s important for you to become aware of how you give away your power. Why? Because learning to be truly powerful enough to create the life that you want, entails making sure you aren’t LOSING power to others.
Let’s look at some examples of how you give away your power. Do you have someone in your life who you feel ‘brings out the worst’ in you? Does whether you are having a good or bad day depend on how your boss or partner or child is feeling and behaving? Does your happiness depend on other people’s approval? Do you complain about your life a lot?
In these examples (and you might have many more to add) you are giving away your power to other people and to external situations. If you want a better life, you have to TAKE BACK the power that you are giving away, and start behaving in more positive, proactive ways. So what could you be doing differently? Here are five things you could think about:
1. Take Responsibility for Your Emotions
Do NOT allow other people to determine how you feel. People do not ‘bring out’ the worst in you. You CHOOSE to be angry, sad, unhappy, etc. If someone says something negative to you, you have the choice of whether to accept their opinion (and its ALWAYS only their opinion) or to reject it.
2. Don’t Complain, Be a Change Agent
When things go wrong, it’s pointless complaining. Look instead at what you can do to change the situation for the better. Be proactive, not reactive. A powerless person complains. A powerful person works to make things better.
3. Ask For What You Want.
If you want something of a partner, a boss, or perhaps a friend, then ASK for it. If they refuse to give you what you want, accept it, then find other ways to achieve your goals. Many people go through life thinking other people should be reading their minds and magically knowing what they need. When people are not able to, they feel rejected, despondent, a victim. Make your voice heard in a positive way. Speak up. Ask. Act on your own behalf.
4. Don’t Follow Others: Stand Up for What You Believe In
Again, in the most positive of ways, stand up for your own beliefs. Don’t follow others blindly, or because you’re afraid of what they might think. Don’t lose power by being agreeable and meek. Be yourself, and allow others to be themselves.
5. Know Your Own Worth: Don’t Look for Approval
We only look for approval because we are not sure of ourselves. Do some exploration of your own strengths. Acknowledge them. Write them down. Find proof of them. FEEL them. If you can do this, then that sense of self-esteem will fill you. You won’t need anyone else to make you feel good about yourself.